Search for a Happy Middle

Search for a Happy Middle

All young girls watch movies like Cinderella, Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin, and many others. Incidentally causing them to grow up thinking that fairy tales do come true. While I don’t think fairy tales are impossible I do think that … Continue reading

The Best Birth Control Possible

DSC_0017Disclaimer: This post was written with my own personal experiences in mind. I do not mean to be offensive in any way.

I personally have always had doubts about whether or not I would ever like to have children. They take a lot of hard work and effort. It is a serious commitment. A commitment that too many people don’t take seriously enough if you ask me. For example a lot of girls that I graduated with in high school got pregnant shortly before or after graduation. All those girls were crazy in my mind! However, I partly must blame their parents.

And I will now let you in on the secret….

Their parents should have given them siblings, lots and lots of them. I personally believe that siblings are probably the best birth control possible. Especially my sister, she can be quite a hellion. Kids are so much work and without the proper care they may not become the best possible version of themselves.
I love my sister so much but she definitely has taught me many things about kids, that have made me think twice about procreating:

1. Girls are hormonal long before they hit puberty.

2. As much as I want to hate her I cannot.

3. Children are a sponge they will learn everything you do (good or bad).

4.  One of those boys in her life will take her heart and I will be terrified.

5. No matter the hate that her mother has instilled in her of me she finds a way to look past it and love me.

6. She never quits growing presently she is one inch shorter than me for now.

7. She confuses me beyond belief daily.

8. She is inconceivably innocent and fragile.

9. I can’t be her best friend until she is much older. No, now I must be her role model.

10. But most of all, I realized that my life has never been the same since she came into the picture.

Even though, a sibling is clearly not your child you get a feeling of responsibility for them. It is something that is almost impossible to explain. I would not trade my sister for the world but, it has been a long ride that has barely begun.

I know there will be many times yet to come where:

I will want to strangle her for any careless decisions. I will become angry with the boys who break her heart. I will be there to listen to her worries, fears, and worst of all high school drama. I will be one phone call away when she needs a “girl’s day” to escape from reality. I will call her to catch up on her life events no matter how little they seem to me. I will always remember that I am her only sister and therefore, she expects the world of me. I will be there for her on every important event like her prom, graduation day, first job, first car, first date, wedding day, and oh my goodness her pregnancies.

While she is not my child she is my sister. Personally, I feel like being the sibling somehow has more responsibility than a parent. I will be there when our parents have passed. I will always be closer to her own age therefore, I will understand her easier (hopefully). I am the sister with whom she will confide in and I have to be there for all of those things that she will expect out of me.

I have a lot of responsibilities yet to come. I am not sure if I am prepared for them quite yet. However, ready or not here they come. Through all of this uncertainty I am sure that if I am not prepared to be a sister how in the world can I expect to be a parent right now.

If and when I become a parent I will have a new perspective and appreciation for the responsibilities that come with it.

Kindess is Necessary

This picture speaks more truth then a lot of people may realize. I once was out to dinner with a guy that I had been spending a lot of time with and he treated the waiter like he was the scum of the earth. Now let me add that I have had my share of times where I have been rude to a waiter or waitress because they have been actually horrible at their job. However, he acted this way at a restaurant every time we went. There is absolutely no excuse to be rude to someone just because their job is to serve you.

Until I had gone out to dinner with this guy I had thought he was such a sweet guy he treated me like a lady and opened the door for me and everything. After seeing how he acted towards other people I began to wonder what was I willing to give up to be treated like a lady? I was not willing to be walking around with a guy that opened the door for me and then practically slammed it in others faces. I wanted a guy that would open the door whether it was for me or if it was for a bum off the street. I am looking for a guy who is kind all around not just to me.

In reality what makes a guy special? His thoughtfulness, kindness, masculinity, and some possibility of romance. Now if I find a guy like that I want to be able to tell all my friends about him and all the great things he does. Now when my friends meet him I want them to see the great things I have said in action. All in all, I want a guy who will treat others the same way that he treats me.

I think that this is an important life lesson for men and women. I only speak from a girls perspective because thats the perspective I know. Something else that I know is that both men and women deserve kindness and respect. So we all need to think about how we treat others. I know I will because when I go out on a date with someone I pay attention to how they are acting towards me and others and I want the kind of guy that people tsay wow what a gentleman!

They Always Come Running Back..

To start of this post properly I need to explain to everyone that I am truly a skeptic at heart. I question everything. I find that there is more fraudulence in most things than truth. Not to say that I believe everything is false I just feel that the truth is hidden and we must work at finding it. I feel that too many people in the world believe something because they read it on the internet or heard it “through the grapevine”.

There was a point in my life where I felt that this “quote” was just another one of those things that people say to you to help you feel better about your break-up. Well I am living proof that this saying has some validity to it.

So here’s my story…

I was in a junior in a private high school. Yes, you just read it right a private high school eekk.. (I’ll save that explanation for another post) Well, I met this guy lets call him Thomas. He was tall, tan, and completely adorable. I think he was most attractive when he smiled which of course was rare. We went out on our first date that I actually made happen. It was quite a night! We got to know each other very well. We began our relationship that next week after our date. We shared a lot of things together. He was my prom date, junior college boyfriend. Lets face it if my name came up in a conversation Thomas’ was next up. We were that couple that everyone would always say WOW! they are still together. All though, we were not as perfect as we seemed. Toward the end of our relationship he began to show that he was not committed or interested in our relationship any longer.

Fast forward almost three years and we break up. I was heartbroken to say the least. I had begun to get to the point where I didn’t see my life without him in the picture somewhere. Looking back the break-up was one of the best things for me! Being the skeptic I am I look back in disbelief that I had been so stupid. How could I have become so dependent on someone else to complete my life? I needed to get back to MY life! Now saying that was the easiest part. I had not realized how difficult it would be to be okay without Thomas.

I cried for many nights and cried a whole lot more when he got a new girlfriend. Of course out of anger I went and found other guys to hang out with. As many of you girls know its not hard to find guys to be around however, it is extremely difficult to find guys you want to be around.  That being said I did not find anyone that I enjoyed being around more than Thomas. I found a couple of good guy “friends”, but we all know that NEVER works out. I even found a guy that I was sexually attracted to. The only problem was that he wasn’t the kind of guy that I would want to be in a relationship with.

Now I hope everyone is keeping up… Fast forward a little over a year.

Thats right I started dating Thomas at 16 and now I am 20 years old. It kills me that one guys has consumed me for such a long time.

Well, here it comes after a year and four months of not hardly speaking except for a text message here and there Thomas tells me that he misses me. Of course I tell him I miss him as well, not thinking much of it. I figured it was a platonic I miss you, but I don’t want to get back together with you. Well boy was I wrong! He wanted to get back together with me pretty badly. I of course was very skeptic of his motives. Therefore, I told him that we would need to spend some time together and see where it goes. Well of course, now I am wondering Did I make the right decision?

I fully believe that there was no right or wrong option for me. I had to go with my gut. Which let me add is one of my least favorite things to do! I like to be able to weigh the pros and cons and then make somewhat of an informed decision. I fear that the only way I am going to be able to tell if I made the right decision or not is see what happens. I need to see if he truly has changed and then decide if I want to continue with him.

So obviously, as you can see the question isn’t whether or not they will come running back. The question is when they do come back will you let them back in or not. [and that is a question only you can answer for yourself]

Feel free to comment if you would like. I am sharing this story to help those of you dealing with a heartbreak.

I’m a Difficult Female?

If there is one thing about myself that I would like to be known for it would be my strength. The idea of being a young, strong, beautiful woman is the greatest overall achievement in my mind. I am not the kind of person to keep my feelings inside of me. Even if I try my face gives me away. What can I say I am a full disclosure type of person. I know that I have flaws and one of them tends to be that I will make up an opinion of someone before I even know them. However, if they are not that type of person I realize it and will gladly change my perception of them. I feel like I have started to overcome that flaw just by simply admitting it. My purpose for this post is simply to make known that all you girls out there are not alone. We all can be bitches at times, lets face it we have a genetic disposition to be that way we can’t always help it. Besides, we have a lot in life to overcome and we can’t be sweet all the time or no one would take us seriously.

Some may feel that being a woman is a shortcoming of some short. YES! It is hard to be a woman but you know what? I wouldn’t want it any other way. Who would want to be a man? Women are the ones actually in control we just let them men think they are. I must say one of my favorite movie quotes is from My Big Fat Greek Wedding : “The man is the head, but the woman is the neck. And she can turn the head any way she wants.” The quote honestly explains itself perfectly! This has got to be one of woman’s best kept secrets from men.

A great man is one who helps a woman because he knows that a good woman is fragile. We can do almost everything a man can do, but that doesn’t mean we should have too. A man is our protector women have a lot of responsibilities as it is and we should not have to carry all the weight on our shoulders. Which is why I fully believe that beside (not behind or ahead) every great woman is a wonderful man sharing the weight of the world. So while all you females are out conquering the world remember you shouldn’t have to do it alone! Don’t be afraid to let someone in your life to help you along the way. However, do not let the bad stigma attached to being a female define you. You are strong yet very fragile which is what makes being a women so beautiful. We are difficult and mysteriously confusing. Embrace your gifts!

My First Post

Normally I tend to be a very private person. I have not thought that any of my thoughts were necessarily worth sharing with others or that anyone may be interested in what I have to say. With that said this blog is going to be full of my thoughts and life experiences. I hope you enjoy and can find my words interesting. My goal is that my thoughts have an impact on others in a positive way somehow. Please feel free to comment and let me know what you think.

Well here it goes………..

I am a college student who recently moved out on my own. It has been a very interesting experience to say the least. At first I was very scared and nervous, but after it was all said and done I absolutely loved it! It is a liberating feeling knowing that you can do whatever you like and no one is there to ask you what time you will be home or if they think you should go. I have not come from a family that was super strict but more protective than anything. I by no means feel like I had the best childhood, but either way for better or worse it shaped me into the adult that I am now. Wow! its so weird to be able to call myself an adult.
I am 20 years old at the moment however I have a birthday coming in about 6 months, the big 21! That will be an exciting milestone in my life that I have been looking forward to since I was about 15. Although the more I think about it the more I realize that once you turn 21 thats it. What else is an exciting milestone birthday after you turn 21? I can’t really think of one which is somewhat depressing within the last few months I have really realized how much I have aged and matured over the years. Its one thing to look at the pictures and see how you have changed physically, but it is especially liberating to realize how much you have grown on the inside as well.

I personally feel like the best is yet to come for me. Even though I will always look back at my childhood years and smile that is not where I would rather be. Of course being a child seems easy because you don’t have any real responsibilities, but it was a very trying time for me. I am happy to be at the point in my life where I now have complete control over what I achieve.

I look forward to the journey through adulthood and all of the experiences that will come with it!